[Couple Spotlight] ‘We flirt intentionally, plan us alone days,’ The Olusesis speak on friendship, love, parenting, other marital issues

What started as normal church courtesy for the Olusesis has now turned out to be a building block for a solid marital foundation. 

Both were young church members with passion to serve God with their talents. One was in the media team, while the other joined the choir. Everyone going about assigned responsibilities with nothing suggestive of a close relationship till both found themselves as members of planning committee for their youth conference.

But it didn’t start smoothly as there was instances of conflicts. However, Mr Olusesi’s willingness to amend things without putting up the usual manly ego was the deal breaker. All along observant of this, Mrs Olusesi knew that this is a man she can build a home with. And true to that, a beautiful home has been standing for five years now.

One year of friendship and five years of doing life together after exchanging marital vows, it’s been a journey of intentionality, persistent love, communication about any and everything and selfishly caring for each other even after the arrival of kids.

This is the story of the Olusesis. Another exciting, yet educating episode of your scintillating Couple Spotlight for both singles and married. Come with me!

 

1. Can you take us back to how your love story started?

Mr. Olusesi: We met in our local church in Ikeja. She joined the choir and I was in the media team. At first it was just normal church courtesy — “good morning”, “God bless you”. Then we were both assigned to plan a youth conference and that was where conversation started. Work turned to friendship, and before we knew it, we were talking after every rehearsal.

Mrs. Olusesi: I liked that he didn’t rush anything. He allowed friendship to breathe.

 

2. What was the moment you knew “this is the one”?

Mrs. Olusesi: It was when we had a conflict during the planning of that same conference. I expected him to get defensive, instead he worked with my correction calmly. That day I said in my mind: “a man who can drop ego this early, I can build life with him.”

Mr. Olusesi: For me, it was how she prays, not loud, not dramatic but consistent. I said, “this one is a home builder.”

 

3. How many years have you been together?

Both: Five years married, six years knowing ourselves.

 

4. What has been your secret to keeping the spark alive all these years? Especially after the arrival of kids.

Mr. Olusesi: We deliberately schedule “us only” days even if it is just one hour in the car alone before we pick the children.

Mrs. Olusesi: We also flirt intentionally. We send playful voice notes during the day, and we still dress up for each other at home, not only for church or outings.

 

5. How do you both make each other feel special, even in small ways? What fun habits have stayed with you throughout your marriage?

Mrs. Olusesi: He randomly buys me puff-puff on his way home because he knows it is my weakness. Lol.

Mr. Olusesi: She still writes tiny sticky notes and hides them in my laptop or wardrobe. One will just say “Thank you for working hard for this home.” That thing enters my bone.

 

6. How do you handle disagreements or tough moments now, compared to your early years?

Mr. Olusesi: Early marriage, we talked in the heat. Now we have a rule: no heavy conversations when anybody is hungry, angry or tired. We pause, breathe, revisit later.

Mrs. Olusesi: We also do not invite third parties in the first 48 hours. We try to settle inside first.

 

7. What’s one thing your partner still does that melts your heart?

Mrs. Olusesi: He greets me every morning with “How is my queen?” No matter how serious life is, he begins soft.

Mr. Olusesi: The way she prays for me out loud sometimes, not advice, just prayer ,my chest will just soften.

 

8. What was one of the biggest challenges you faced together, and how did you overcome it?

Mr. Olusesi: Transition to parenting. Our first child came with sleepless nights and short tempers.

Mrs. Olusesi: We overcame by redefining expectations. We accepted that that season required more patience than romance, and we kept communicating instead of assuming.

 

9. What advice would you give to younger couples hoping for a lasting marriage?

Both: Choose someone you can talk to, not just someone you like. Conversation is the oxygen of a long marriage. And don’t stop doing the things that made you choose each other in the first place.

 

10. If you could sum up your marriage in one word or sentence, what would it be?

Both: “Grace meeting effort, daily.”