Former Big Brother Nigeria (BBNaija) housemate Vee recently opened up about her feelings about love.
The 27-year-old reality actress acknowledged in an interview with the “Dear Ife” podcast that she had never been in a committed relationship, citing problems with vulnerability and trust.
Vee, whose real name was Victoria Adeyele, also made a distinction between “blindly in love” and true love.
“You know to enjoy love you have to have no guard,” she said.
“You have to completely trust someone. And maybe that’s why I don’t think I have ever truly been there yet.
“I think I have loved someone but I don’t think I have been in love, like blindly in love.
“[Because] there’s always something… I’m someone who would see a red flag and maybe fold it up and keep it in my pocket. But I have it and I’m aware of it.”
The reality star also disclosed that lying is a major red flag for her.
“Everyone has their red flags, but I think one major one that causes me to step back and keep my guard up is the lies,” she said.
“I’ve been in a situation where a random account messaged me with screenshots, saying that they had been sending naked pictures to my partner.
“She said that she wanted to test our relationship on my behalf, and he had seen them and liked a few.
“When I presented the situation to him, he said, ‘Oh, my manager was on that account, people are sharing my account’ and … just the story wasn’t straight at the end of the day.
“But I just knew lies were being told because it will never make sense … you know you can always sense when someone is lying.”
Vee also said she believes relationships don’t necessarily need to end in marriage.
“…my friends hate it when I say it but not everybody’s gonna get married,” she said.
“And the easier and the sooner we accept that, a lot of people, especially women — a lot of women’s lives will be better.
“… If I’m dating someone for, ok, let’s say three or four years, and I don’t even have an inkling of marriage, well, let’s be each other’s partner.
“We make each other happy, we’re stable, we’re in a good position. There’s love, it’s not toxic. Haven’t you seen those people that date for years, they get married and something scatters?”
Vee also advocated for open discussions about intentions in non-marital relationships.
“Maybe it’s me personally, and it’s a confusing thing. Do I want to get married? Yes, because maybe I’ve been nurtured into that idea,” she said.
“I think society says so, culture says so, nurture, maybe even nature says so. But will I die if I don’t get married?
“I know if I’m with someone who makes me happy, and maybe we’ve had that conversation—obviously we want to get married—and four, five years go down the line and we’re not, but I’ll be happy.”
